By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND
"TANJOOBERRYMUTTS"...and be ready for China .
In order to continue getting-by in China , we need to learn English the
way it is spoken.......................
Practice by reading the following conversation until you are able to
understand the term "TANJOOBERRYMUTTS".
With a little patience, you'll be able to fit right in.
Now, here goes...
The following is a telephonic exchange between maybe you as a hotel
guest and room-service today......
Room Service : "Morrin. Roon sirbees."
Guest : "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."
Room Service: " Rye . Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???"
Guest: "Uh..... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs."
Room Service: "Ow ulai den?"
Guest: ".....What??"
Room Service: "Ow ulai den?!?... Pryed, boyud, pochd?"
Guest: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry.. Scrambled, please."
Room Service: "Ow ulai dee bayken ? Creepse?"
Guest: "Crisp will be fine."
Room Service: "Hokay. An sahn toes?"
Guest: "What?"
Room Service: "An toes. ulai sahn toes?"
Guest: "I.... Don't think so.."
RoomService: "No? Udo wan sahn toes???"
Guest: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'udo wan
sahn toes' means."
RoomService: "Toes! Toes!...Why Uoo don wan toes? Ow bow Anglish
moppin we botter?"
Guest: "Oh, English muffin! !! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'...
Fine...Yes, an English muffin will be fine."
RoomService: "We botter?"
Guest: "No, just put the botter on the side."
RoomService: "Wad?!?"
Guest: "I mean butter... Just put the butter on the side."
RoomService: "Copy?"
Guest: "Excuse me?"
RoomService: "Copy...tea..meel?"
Guest: "Yes. Coffee, please... And that's everything."
RoomService: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, creepse bayken , Anglish moppin,
we botter on sigh and copy ... Rye ??"
Guest: "Whatever you say."
RoomService: "Tanjooberrymutts."
Guest: "You're welcome"
Remember I said "By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND
'TANJOOBERRYMUTTS' ......and you do, don't you! :-) :-)
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
pearls of wisdom
1.Whenever you find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
2.To Err is human, but to forgive is not a COMPANY policy.
3.The road to success??.. Is always under construction.
4.Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.
5.In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you have ability to repay back.
6.All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening.
7.Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear
8.Everyone has a scheme of getting rich?.. Which never works.
9.If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried.
10.You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side.
11.Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.
12. 42.7% of all statistics is made on the spot.
13.As soon as you mention something?? If it is good, it is taken?. If it is bad, it happens.
14.He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule.
15.If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late?? The bus is still late.
16.Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate.
17.When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions. Â
18.If you have paper, you don't have a pen. If you have a pen, you don't have paper. If you have both, no one calls.
19.Especially for engg. Students : If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.
20.You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.
21.The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.
Â
22.After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other.
Â
23.If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight.
24.Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker
25.Before borrowing money from a friend, decide whether you need more.
26.There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.
27.An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
28.Many things can be preserved in alcohol. Dignity is not one of them.
29.Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
30.When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
31.Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
32.Well done is better than well said .
33.Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody is looking.
34.Where there is a WILL, there is a WAY, Where there is MONEY, there are many WAYS.
35.Where there is MONEY, there are many FRIENDS and RELATIVES.
36.Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
2.To Err is human, but to forgive is not a COMPANY policy.
3.The road to success??.. Is always under construction.
4.Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk.
5.In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you have ability to repay back.
6.All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive or fattening.
7.Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear
8.Everyone has a scheme of getting rich?.. Which never works.
9.If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried.
10.You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side.
11.Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner.
12. 42.7% of all statistics is made on the spot.
13.As soon as you mention something?? If it is good, it is taken?. If it is bad, it happens.
14.He who has the gold, makes the rules ---- Murphy's golden rule.
15.If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late?? The bus is still late.
16.Once you have bought something, you will find the same item being sold somewhere else at a cheaper rate.
17.When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions. Â
18.If you have paper, you don't have a pen. If you have a pen, you don't have paper. If you have both, no one calls.
19.Especially for engg. Students : If you have bunked the class, the professor has taken attendance.
20.You will pick up maximum wrong numbers when on roaming.
21.The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom.
Â
22.After a long wait for bus no.20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be crowded than the other.
Â
23.If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight.
24.Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker
25.Before borrowing money from a friend, decide whether you need more.
26.There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.
27.An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
28.Many things can be preserved in alcohol. Dignity is not one of them.
29.Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
30.When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.
31.Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
32.Well done is better than well said .
33.Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody is looking.
34.Where there is a WILL, there is a WAY, Where there is MONEY, there are many WAYS.
35.Where there is MONEY, there are many FRIENDS and RELATIVES.
36.Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
ongc exam- before
Today i got an ongc exam coming up..so i thought i mite just add a post about my feelings n the amount of preparation i put in...
Feelings-not feeling good bcoz i had a late breakfast, i had a sore eye when i got up which has cleared by now, had a very bad cold which is threatening to come back...and yes..about the exam..no tension at all..the reason is explained below.
Preparations-read through a really fat copy of footnotes from the start of a book for objective questions on geology(ongc questions, upsc question etc), touched krishnan, but didn't open it, whizzed through billings and parbin singh and then at last went online to check for any help with general awareness..here comes the big shocker, i checked some previous years papers...but the GENERAL AWARENESS was not that general..it was very difficult and i msgd the links to my friends who gave up any more attempts to study..thats pretty much the end of my study time..
Now its just any other exam...maybe i will prepare for the exam next year...actually prepare..will come up with post later this day about d actual exam..if there will be anything to write about it. c ya
Sunday, October 18, 2009
drunken brawl....
the best formula for a drunken brawl....Free booze+some more free booze+Young airheads n der u got it...perfect formula for a brawl..n den u got some ppl who like to take advantage of d drunks...like one of my friends..here is d situation...
Drunk person:'If i get a kt in my fy den u can give me 2 slaps'...n den he gets one slap from my friend..so he is back to normal halfway..no one expected d slap..but it came wit a flash n served its purpose...
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Beauty of english language
A sentence that can be made to have 8 different meanings by placing one word in all possible positions in the sentence. "I hit him in the eye yesterday"
The word is "only'
1 Only i hit him in the eye yesterday...(no one else did)
2 I only hit him in the eye yesterday...(did not slap him)
3 I hit only him in the eye yesterday...(i did not hit others)
4 I hit him only in the eye yesterday...(i did not hit outside the eye)
5 I hit him in only the eye yesterday...(not other organs)
6 I hit him in the only eye yesterday...(he doesn't have another eye)
7 I hit him in the eye only yesterday...(not today)
8 I hit him in the eye yesterday only...(did not wait for today)
this is the beauty of English language.
The word is "only'
1 Only i hit him in the eye yesterday...(no one else did)
2 I only hit him in the eye yesterday...(did not slap him)
3 I hit only him in the eye yesterday...(i did not hit others)
4 I hit him only in the eye yesterday...(i did not hit outside the eye)
5 I hit him in only the eye yesterday...(not other organs)
6 I hit him in the only eye yesterday...(he doesn't have another eye)
7 I hit him in the eye only yesterday...(not today)
8 I hit him in the eye yesterday only...(did not wait for today)
this is the beauty of English language.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
confusin pic
here is a picture i had clicked coz i had no other time-pass...it is a picture of a scale model of an vintage Impala..i did not want to show d car's image to my friends as a toy but wanted them to believe that it is d REAL THING...so i cooked up a story that y uncle in goa owns a antique impala and he has kept it in real good condition...surprisingly most of my friends believed my story coz d pics were so brilliant..now i am not bragging or whatever..here r d pics..c for urself..i clicked d last picture just to show my friends the actual size of d car n c d surprised looks on their faces..it was worth the effort!
whiskey and rum flavoured soda????
today was a really odd day..me n my brother went mall browsing and went through almost 6 malls in 2 hours without finding anything interesting, we were browsing for high end phones. Then at this mall called Anupam mall we found a soda pub..dis pub had some the regular orange, mango tango n d works...and dey also had some other flavors titled 'Ayurvedic' flavors..i really didn't bother checking out that list coz d flavor list which caught my eye (and every other alcohol lovers eye) was d list with rum, whiskey and fruit beer flavoured sodas!. we immediately tried two of these flavours, my brother had the rum and a bit of my whiskey too, but didn;t allow me too have any of d rum...so now i know how d whiskey tastes..but not the rum..not a big rum fan, but wana check dat flavor nevertheless. I will surely go der with my fukat group members...dey wont mind a trip to taste cheap alcohol substitutes!
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